


Arc and Pressure

by 3RatMoon



Category: Friends at the Table (Podcast)
Genre: M/M, Mutual Masturbation, Psychic Abilities, Psychic Bond, Sort Of, Things get weird
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-29
Updated: 2018-03-29
Packaged: 2019-04-14 08:23:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,489
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14132061
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/3RatMoon/pseuds/3RatMoon
Summary: Addax had a lot of things on his mind, but he couldn't explain away the strange dreams he was having, and certainly not to Peace.





	Arc and Pressure

**Author's Note:**

> I have no excuses, just have fun, y'all.  
> And thanks to harpydora and citadelofswords for being my FIRST EVER betas, wow!! <3

It started as little more than hazy remembered moments. Addax would wake up in his room, the comforting weight of Peace surrounding him, unable to parse the fragments of his dreams.

He was… somewhere? And Jace was there? Or, maybe he was Jace, and he was looking at himself…

Addax didn’t think of it for long before getting up. He had dreamt of the members of the _Kingdom Come_ and _Seventh Sun_ before, and had certainly dreamt of Jace. They just confirmed what he already knew, which was that the pilot was on his mind.

A lot of things were on Addax’s mind.

After he got ready for the day, he went to the _Seventh Sun,_ and he was surprised to find Jace there. He was without his usual company of Tea and her team, all of whom usually were only just making it to the mess by the time Addax was finished eating. Jace looked up when Addax came in the door, giving a small smile and a wave. Addax couldn’t help but smile back— Jace's sunny nature was contagious— but he could still see the strain in the pilot’s expression.

“You’re up early,” he said when he had gotten his food and sat down.

Jace looked at Addax from across the table, but his gaze quickly fell back to his tray. There were a few potatoes left that he kept poking at but never actually ate.

“Yeah, I didn't sleep great last night,” he said.

“Oh, I'm sorry,” Addax replied, sympathetic. “Do you know what was up?”

Jace shrugged. “Not really. I've had insomnia since I was a kid, so I'm just used to the idea that some nights are gonna be better than others.”

Addax frowned. “Have you… gone to anyone about it?”

“A while back, when I first joined. The medicine I was given didn't help much, but I didn't really go back.” Jace smiled down at his food, as if he knew how little sense it made. “I felt like I was being a bother.”

“I'm sure, out of anyone, _Ace Pilot Jace Rethal_ would deserve a little more of his physician’s time to make sure he sleeps well,” Addax said, sliding his hand across the table in a kind of companionable gesture.

Jace looked back up at Addax  for a moment, before turning away again with a self-conscious laugh. He ran his hand up the back of his neck, his hair curly and too-long around his ears. “You’re real nice, Addax,” he said.

Addax smiled, shrugging. “I try,” he said modestly.

They talked for a little bit after that about nothing in particular. Addax ate and watched Jace, and he felt content in a way he hadn’t in weeks. He could feel it resonate with Peace, like a pleasant hum in his chest, or a rightness like two puzzle pieces slotting perfectly together.

 _This is what we're striving for,_ Addax thought. No more war, no more struggles for power, none of even the nervous energy Jace usually had around him, bright-eyed and looking for the next way to impress his rival. Addax just wanted this Jace— relaxed, unworried, unguarded, allowed to be shy and awkward without trying to spin it to some kind of advantage, as if every conversation was a battle. Addax wanted—

“Addax. Hey, Addax, you there?”

Addax blinked. He was looking at Jace, then for a moment, the image shifted. He thought he remembered something about the dream, a hand reaching, reaching for Jace, or reaching for himself…

_Addax…_

“Addax, are you okay?”

Addax blinked again, and there was the mess and the table and Jace looking at him with concern.

He smiled and rubbed his face. “Sorry, I’m fine. I woke up in the middle of a dream this morning, and I’m a little fuzzy in the head from it.”

“Aw man, I hate when that happens!” Jace replied, and the moment was quickly left behind after that, buried under conversations and trainings and duty.

 

When the dream resurfaced, it was many weeks later, almost forgotten.

Addax woke up on the couch of the officer’s lounge on the _Seventh Sun,_ confused and hard and with adrenaline and Peace’s distant concern buzzing in his head.

He could still feel the shape of Jace against him, the PVC and fabric and armor of their flight suits sliding and catching in different places. He was kissing Jace and he _was_ Jace kissing back desperately, aroused and delighted and afraid of losing the moment. Addax slid his thigh between Jace’s and Jace made a sound high in his throat, one hand reaching for Addax’s hair and the other clutching his ass. Jace was on his tiptoes, angling his hips so Addax could feel it when he started to grind against him. Addax felt pleasure pulsing through him like a heartbeat, felt it echoed in Jace as he gasped and bucked and dug his fingers into Addax’s flesh. Jace was shaking, clinging to him, holding on desperately.

“Oh god, please, Addax,” Jace babbled, “Please, please, please, please—”

Peace called Addax back to the present, their worry throbbing in the back of his head. The request was clear: _come back to me_ . Addax stumbled his way out of the officer’s lounge, thankful for the structure in his flight suit but still trying to will away his erection so it would _stop_ sending signals to his brain with every movement. He succeeded by the time he made it to where Peace was docked with the _Seventh Sun,_ but he still felt hazy and half-asleep, moving almost automatically.

Peace’s relief when Addax stepped inside was palpable. The corridors led him to the bridge immediately, and in the darkness there he felt Peace’s presence like a blanket or a protective embrace.

Addax’s mind jumped briefly to the embrace of the dream, Jace against him and around him, and Peace’s focus zeroed in on the thought. Addax drew back, mentally and physically, embarrassed.

“I don’t know why you’re suddenly interested in my dreams,” Addax said aloud out of habit, but quietly out of shyness. “I can’t be the first Candidate who… you know.”

_The dream was not yours._

Addax blinked. “What?”

Peace answered seriously. _It came from somewhere else._

Snapped momentarily from his embarrassment, he could feel a shiver of feeling through Peace. Concern. Protectiveness. They zipped across Addax’s nerves, searching for any trace of the intruder. They were not used to being caught off-guard.

Eventually, they withdrew again, though their presence remained close around Addax. _I cannot find anything that would lead me to a source,_ they admitted with some frustration.

“It’ll be alright,” Addax said, surprised to be in the position of comforting the Divine when normally it was the other way around, “I’ll stay close and keep a lookout, tell Orth and the others—”

 _We do not know yet who did this, and why._ Peace said, the air around Addax buzzed. _It would be wise to remain quiet until we are able to collect more information._

Addax sighed, conceding. “Alright.” Still, Peace did sense his hesitation, and tried to soothe him. His trust in his companions was admirable, and they wished they were in a time where that trust could always be followed. Addax understood, and he allowed himself to be comforted by their presence close to him. He went to the pilot’s chair, a vague minimalist shape in the blanketing darkness of the bridge, and sat down. Immediately, soft outlines of blue and green turned on around him, revealing a variety of controls previously hidden on the chair. Peace hummed pleasantly, their minds resonating more as they both calmed down.

There really wasn’t much to be updated on, with everyone still a week from the halfway point of their journey through darkspace, so Addax’s thoughts started to wander. He recognized, distantly, the ache low in his belly, remembered the dream. Peace was impassive. The thoughts were his, now, and he could do with them what he wished. Addax leaned back, pressing a palm to his growing arousal with a sigh.

Addax jerked off sleepy and slow, the thought of Jace’s lips in his head and Peace around him, heavy and light and shivering.

 

The months in darkspace were gruelling, but strangely pleasant as well. Officers not part of the strike did what they could to keep everything going, which usually meant performing all the menial tasks normally left to everyone else. Addax found himself spending more time with Jace as they worked together doing routine maintenance and repairs in the ship bay. It was slow, tedious work that they were massively overqualified for, but they made up for it by talking to each other about anything and everything. They compared childhoods on their respective planets, from holidays to education systems and healthcare. They found themselves laughing at things they considered normal growing up that were totally alien to the other, and at strange similarities between them.

Addax couldn’t help feeling like maybe the strike was something they needed. Peace was skeptical, of course. There was unrest in the ranks of the _Seventh Sun,_ and some people took out their frustrations on each other. Addax and the Divine were also no closer to figuring out who had somehow intruded on Addax’s thoughts. Still, Peace also couldn’t deny that there were other changes as well, where the stalemate had given people chances to simply be.

Jace, smiling and covered in grease, looked better than he had in months. Was sleeping better, he said. Addax couldn’t have been happier.

They were days from Counterweight when the dreams came back.

The surprising thing was that Addax wasn’t asleep yet. He was laying in his cot, letting his mind wander, when he thought for a moment that he heard a sigh from someone mere inches from him.

_“Fuck…”_

Addax felt all the hairs on his neck stand up all at once. He recognized that voice.

“Jace?”

 _Addax._ Peace’s alarm was immediate, a shiver through the whole body of the Divine.

“I’m up,” Addax said, getting to his feet. The hallway from his room lead directly to the bridge. Several screens were already up, scrolling through data as Peace searched for the source of the… signal?

Addax sat down, which put both Divine and Candidate a little more at ease; it was the safest place he could be while they figured everything out.  “Nothing yet?” he asked.

 _Not nothing, but not enough to trace just yet._ Peace replied.

For a while, they were quiet, each trying to gather hypotheses, any possible cause of what was happening. Still, Addax was tired and started to lose focus. He thought of that hiss of breath, of the way Jace made that same sound when pressed against him in desperate wanting. Addax shuddered, arousal prickling across his nerves.

Several notifications popped up on the screens, and Peace’s focus sharpened.

Oh. That feeling hadn’t been him. Peace was trying to track the signal back across Addax’s thoughts, and Addax felt ashamed by his vulnerability. Who was doing this, and why? Why Jace, why Jace like _this?_

 _The signal seems to function neurologically, so connections are made by association,_ Peace mused, _Strong emotions make stronger connections. It is very likely that your feelings make the connection easier, like a conductor._

Addax wasn’t sure _how_ he felt at that moment, except that it was making him nauseous.

Peace was a quiet vibration in the air, thinking.

 _If we are cautious,_ they suggested, _you may be able to initiate contact safely, and I can determine how this is happening and if there is any malicious intent._

Addax shifted in the chair. He was still nervous, but he trusted Peace, and the fact that they even considered that this may not be malicious was comforting.

“Alright,” he said.

Of course, now that he was trying purposefully, Addax was finding it difficult to just sit back and think about Jace. For a while, he just fidgeted. He was embarrassed by his infatuation even around Peace, and thinking of someone else, even someone he would never meet, knowing intimately the depth and breadth of his feelings… Still, it was likely they already knew, if the last dream was anything to go by.

That dream… it was a lot like how Addax imagined it might go between him and Jace if it ever happened at all— rushed and quiet, a last minute confession and connection before they left and never saw each other again. But… if Addax could have it his way (and shame gripped him again because he could never, _should_ never demand something that couldn’t be), he would lay Jace down in his bed and work him over with all the love and praise he deserved, until every inch of him sang with it. Addax wanted to trace the lines of his back with his hands, wanted to press kisses into the crease of his hips. He wanted to show Jace how he made him feel— like he was naked in the sun, happy to show all of himself so he could just soak in the hazy, wonderful warmth.

Addax felt another jolt of pleasure, a sound escaping his throat and his hand going to press against his very present erection. He heard Jace moan, and it sounded like he was in the room with him.

“Jace,” Addax whispered. He felt his eyes sting a little. He so badly wished that this could be true.

He imagined Jace there with him, straddling his hips, breath soft over his face. He imagined his hands around Jace’s waist, stroking his sides, kissing both of his cheeks and Jace laughing quietly before catching his lips like they both wanted. Peace was there, a background resonance, protective but not aggressive. Did they find something? Jace rolled his hips and Addax moaned into his mouth, grasped for him, tried to move him closer…

Something flickered in Addax’s mind. He felt Jace’s breath over his neck, his weight over his lap, but a shift and the weight was his weight, the breath his heaving breath, the feeling of his own shirt against his face as he buried it in Addax’s shoulder. He knew it was just him, alone kneeling on his bunk with his hand between his legs, but if he closed his eyes hard enough it felt like he was rutting against Addax, hard underneath his sleep clothes, and…

Addax blinked. He was alone on Peace, sitting at the bridge. He didn’t have a bunk on the _Seventh Sun_ . He looked down at himself, his legs spread and his hand cupping his arousal through his pants. When he looked up, he saw that there was some data still crawling by on the screens, but slowly. There was a basic map of the fleet, Peace and the _Seventh Sun_ and _The Kingdom Come_ . A green circle was laid over one of the upper decks of the _Seventh Sun_. The signal was coming from somewhere in there, Addax guessed. Peace was quiet, waiting, with a vibration that could have been curiosity.

They wanted him to try again? Addax shivered, tense, but only some of it was fear.

He pressed down with the palm of his hand, heard a hiss of breath that may or may not have been his. He reached up for the waistband of his pants, his hands shaking a little.

Would Jace ride him if he offered? He ran his hand over his cock, slow. He heard a whine that was definitely Jace, and the sound sent another shock of sensation through him. He imagined Jace shifting on his knees, pouring lube onto his fingers while Addax rolled on a condom. Jace would check himself, then rub the rest of the lube on Addax’s cock, maybe squeeze a little just to see him jump. Addax imagined his laugh, a kiss as he positioned himself. Jace, with his beautiful face, would look resplendent, eyes fluttering and mouth opening in a sigh as he took pleasure for himself for a moment, as he sunk down, down—

Addax felt another jolt of shame even as his cock jumped in his hand, but Jace sat up, cupped his face with both hands. “Addax, Addax it’s okay. I promise,” he said.

 _This isn’t real,_ Addax wanted to say, _You can’t possibly want this, want_ me. But Addax was starting to have a gut feeling about this in a way that he rarely did about anything. He leaned forward, and Jace met him with his lips, a soft, wet, hungry glide with every assurance Addax could have wanted.

Jace started to move, and things got messy very quickly after that. Addax’s awareness kept flickering between them. He could feel the sensation of Jace around him, but he could also feel the sensation of being filled, which he had felt before, but this was just a little different and amazing and he suddenly craved it. He fucked himself harder, needing Jace’s cock— his fingers— deeper inside him, needing more. Jace moaned and cursed and bucked his hips, grasping at Addax’s shoulders, neck, the back of his head, digging fingers into his hair. His name spilled over his lips, over and over and over, choking and desperate.

It was just like Peace had said— emotions made the connection stronger. And a stronger connection allowed more feelings to pass through, a loop that would overwhelm them quickly except for Peace holding the line. Some part of the Divine was actually scared, realizing that _they_ were the path stretching from mind to mind, was angry because having people who weren’t their Candidate be able to get this deep was _dangerous_ , but Addax held back their fear even as they kept the echoes of emotion and sensation from shaking him apart completely. Addax was reaching back just as much at this point, reaching, please know, please understand, this is me, my heart, everything, I can’t hold back anymore, please.

Addax and Jace lost themselves in the feeling of skin and flesh and nails, their bodies floating and indistinct except for the visceral flex of muscle and rush of breath and the growing heat in their guts like nebulae waiting to become stars. And that’s what it felt like— an ignition, all potentials released in one grand chain reaction after enough pressure was applied. They might have cried out, overwhelmed, but it was lost in the rush of information between neurons and electric circuits.

But as soon as the rush abated, the connection suddenly fell slack. Addax blinked as if woken from a dream, his spent cock in his hand and his clothes soiled. Peace was quiet in a way Addax hadn’t seen in months.

He stood up, still in a daze. Finally his Divine’s attention returned.

 _Where are you going?_ they asked.

“To change my clothes,” Addax said, wiping his hand on his pants even as he staggered towards the door, “And to go to bed.”

Peace seemed to want to protest, but didn’t, and Addax felt far too burned out to try to figure out why. He did precisely what he said he was going to do, and when he got up in the morning, Peace didn’t bring up the previous night.

Nobody brought it up, in fact. Addax thought he might have heard one of the Queen’s Gambit complain about how “Rethal can’t keep his wanking to himself,” when he was leaving the mess, but he couldn’t be sure. They were too busy to talk one-on-one, with the final mission to get ready for and discussions on what to do with the weapon heating up. The last part was really worrying him, and his simulations didn’t help. Nor did Peace, who Addax thought was doing better during their time in darkspace but was starting to act strangely again. In all of it, Addax honestly felt lonely.

Maybe that’s why he allowed those other thoughts to surface, he would think. Maybe that’s why he allowed Order to get to him. If only he had really tried to talk to Jace, instead of hoping and fearing running into him in the hallways or getting caught the last one out of the meeting room on the _Kingdom Come_. If only he had said something, anything.

Instead, he allowed the last few days to slip away, along with his last hopes for the Fleet and the War. He was suited up in the ship bay and facing his friend and rival and the love of his life, feeling like his was he was having his insides carved out with grief because he was positive, more than any other time, that he was never going to see him again. Jace looked up and smiled, weakly, allowing his mask to break when Addax would not.

The pilot extended a hand. “Best of luck out there, as always,” he said, soft.

Addax took it, tried not to squeeze too hard. “Likewise.”

**Author's Note:**

> IT'S FINE, they find each other again later and get into sexy shenanigans while they're long distance like all the time, I promise


End file.
